2024-MAR-01 Info: Check out Songwriting Competition 079 if you're into "Synthwave" music making.

SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Winners announced

Thematic Songwriting Competition - recurrence: monthly
wishoff

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#91

Post by wishoff »

becsei_gyorgy wrote:
Sun Aug 30, 2020 12:18 CEST
Telling the truth I thought all of you make longer songs as described MisterFox. Maybe something I misunderstood.

"A song length of 5-7 minutes is no problem for them to integrate, in fact, they even look forward to that."
You are absolutely right, my bad :)
TrojakEW

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#92

Post by TrojakEW »

For All
First want to explain some thing about my view on all tracks. I do not take in to account selected sub genre. Why? First because I do not know anything about it and second I do really not care about any sub genre in general at all. Choice for this round was Drum and Bass. So if track is in any dnb style then it is good for me.

More important for me was theme Video Game Soundtrack - Race to the top. Word soundtrack is most important since it should tell us what is the purpose of the music. I always see music as kind of story no matter the style especially if it is soundtrack. For me racing is not just aggressive drive represented by aggressive lead or bass sound. There are many other emotions and the composition itself should tell us this story. There are dramatic scenes that should be rendered by your ideas in your track. There may be tragic scenes or happy (winning scenes). I do not like limits and I do like experiments. More expressions are needed regardless there are any melodic limits in style. There are also different places for music to be used in game and not just actual racing track - like menu, cut scenes and so on.

Also I included some basic statistics for all tracks to compare.
---------------------------------------
J I L L I A M - Kill Me
Like the simple composition. Even there is only one theme within the track and even it is not in desired tempo it have really nice drive feel. It paint image of dangerous scene where racers jeopardize them self in order to gain small lead. Cars hitting each other. After minute there is break and it have feel that danger is gone. At least for some short time. Final part of track is also interesting. That slow down really make it sounds like player loose.

Now what I really do not like is sound. I can not comment on mix or master because every sound here is distorted in bad way. It is not creating drive but harm the whole mix. It is really like hard clipping on every single sound. This make it really, really hard to listen.

So yes track fit the game soundtrack but mix need to be fixed. Do not know what you have returned to your old bad habits with this one since your last mixes sounds whole lot of better.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -6,6 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -8,7 LUFS
Integrated loudness -11,4 LUFS
Loudness range 4,8 LU
True peak L -0.12dB
True peak R +0.11dB (17 samples clipped)
DC offset L -0.001% (-100.2dB)
DC offset R 0.000% (-112.0dB)
---------------------------------------
Doc Jon - Gridlock
I'm enjoying different atmosphere in between different parts. Track should be ideal for intro or game trailer where those fast aggressive parts represents dangerous racing scenes while other should represent different view to to different parts like preparation or any other non aggressive activities.

Mix sound balanced but like me it miss more power in lows. Kick is mostly inaudible and snare takes the lead for rhythm. Some sound have phasing issues especially those in that slow passages. Nothing serious but they loose some power when played in mono.

Yes it definitely fit the theme.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -10,7 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -11,6 LUFS
Integrated loudness -14,2 LUFS
Loudness range 13,4 LU
True peak L -0.82dB
True peak R -0.61dB
DC offset L 0.000% (-176.3dB)
DC offset R 0.000% (-152.9dB)
---------------------------------------
Jorgeelalto - Afterburner
Here I will start first with mix. I like space in frequency spectrum. Nice air and a lot of power in low and sub frequencies. All sounds have they place and do not interfere with each other. But at the same time stage is narrow. It sound like everything is in center with just different width. Good that you redone you mix and put it in -14LUFS. For true peak you should have bigger reserve especially for streaming services. Compression on streaming will service peak it above 0dB during compression. If you want to avoid additional unwanted distortion on your track true peak should be below -1dB.

For me track is more suited for kind of demo purpose or trailer of game but not racing track directly in game especially with those slower parts with that pad.

Another track that fits the theme nicely.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -9,6 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -10,8 LUFS
Integrated loudness -14,0 LUFS
Loudness range 11,8 LU
True peak L -0.21dB
True peak R -0.21dB
DC offset L +0.150% (-56.5dB)
DC offset R +0.150% (-56.5dB)
---------------------------------------
becsei_gyorgy - Midnight Run
I do like intro of this track very cool atmospheric stuff create tension before race. Regarding track itself it looks like me this style doesn't suit you. Composition is not bad but sounds feels that they are placed in order just to fulfill requirements for genre. There is nice driving rhythm and you are trying to implement some "evolution" to track but it still sound repetitive because of repeating synth effects and patterns. I do not blame you I have problem with such a style myself. That vocal is not bad but it sticks out too much for me.

Mix sounds bit muddy, again same problem in my track because same as me you trying to layer more sounds that is used in this genre making it hard to tame. Some sounds are bit harsh. Stage is narrow some sounds here and there add bit of depth.

Track fits the theme. I think different style suits you better and I think you should not avoid your approach because of different genre.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -9,5 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -11,0 LUFS
Integrated loudness -14,0 LUFS
Loudness range 4,6 LU
True peak L -0.24dB
True peak R -0.06dB
DC offset L +0.000% (-116.5dB)
DC offset R +0.000% (-116.3dB)
---------------------------------------
J.Ruegg - HyperBoost
Track is interesting with interesting atmosphere thanks to those mallets there. It adds really unexpected tension. Intro is very very good. Sounds are cool. Now I know your work I am 100% sure that you can make far better stuff then this one. I'm not saying track is bad but I think it is not your usual approach. Maybe the theme itself change your view on track and you were trying to make something different like the part starting at 1:52 that is good but it is like you forget about what you like to do.

Now mix sounds good but you overdo it regarding loudness. It is very loud and squashed. This also affect true peaks that are in unacceptable range causing a lot of clipping (check stats bellow).

Track fits the theme well.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -4,4 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -5,3 LUFS
Integrated loudness -6,7 LUFS
Loudness range 2,9 LU
True peak L +3.61dB (33685 samples clipped)
True peak R +3.67dB (24475 samples clipped)
DC offset L +0.016% (-75.9dB)
DC offset R +0.013% (-77.9dB)
---------------------------------------
Olli H - Gatekeeper
Now this is unique track. Really like approach here. Composition is great and evolving and I like it the most in this round. Really good job for me.

Now mix is weak. Especially kick in drums. Levels of some instruments are bit off here and there like that synth effects at 1:52. Adding guitars there was cool idea but trying to make them too synthetic doesn't add anything. For me it sounds weird - uncanny valley. Making them synth only or real distorted will fit it better. Looks like many sounds have phasing issues and some sounds are very weak when played in mono.

Track fits the theme very well and composition leave best story behind.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -8,4 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -10,2 LUFS
Integrated loudness -15,0 LUFS
Loudness range 7,4 LU
True peak L -1.15dB
True peak R -1.09dB
DC offset L -0.001% (-102.1dB)
DC offset R -0.001% (-101.6dB)
---------------------------------------
Double Tap - Amen, Brake
Nice contrast between aggressive driving drums and background ambient pads. It really create dramatic tension. Change at 2:44 is nice but it change the mood too much and kind of drift out of theme. Even part that starting around 2:58 doesn't add any fuel. It is more opposite and relaxing mood that is hard to put anywhere in racing game soundtrack. But track itself is very interesting and I really like that contrast.

Mix sounds balanced but some more power in low spectrum could improve it a lot. Kick and bass is weak. Stage is there.

The first half can be used in racing game soundtrack but second half is too melancholic. Even that fast rhythm there doesn't help because it is pushed back with those ambient pads. It fits more kind of space simulator/shooter game with spaceships.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -11,8 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -13,7 LUFS
Integrated loudness -16,5 LUFS
Loudness range 5,2 LU
True peak L -1.58dB
True peak R -0.02dB
DC offset L +0.000% (-113.4dB)
DC offset R +0.000% (-113.4dB)
---------------------------------------
Clueless - Insideout Upsidedown
Now this is really good track that act as background music for racing and leave some space for additional sound on stage in game. Very good and maybe ideal composition for game.

Regarding mix, normally I will add more power to low spectrum but in regards as I mention that it is maybe best approach for game soundtrack it is not needed. Some sounds have some bad resonance around 1,5kHz that should get some treatment. Also something here produce some kind of comping effect on whole track. Maybe it only because of those nasty resonance bit it sound bit strange. Adding stats for both mp3 and also wav version. I was listening to wav version downloaded from SC.

I think you really nailed music for game soundtrack. Simple not distracting, good.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -11,9 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -14,6 LUFS
Integrated loudness -16,1 LUFS
Loudness range 6,3 LU
True peak L -1.31dB
True peak R -1.33dB
DC offset L 0.000% (-167.6dB)
DC offset R 0.000% (-174.8dB)
---------------------------------------
The Exponent - Hyperdrive
What to say. Awesome track with inspiring sounds and nice composition. There are many different emotion that make track interesting. Intro with piano is cool and well whole track is cool.

Mix sounds good and powerful. Only that some sounds have really serious phase correlation problems. For example that bell sound in intro. In mono sound is almost inaudible.

Track easily fit in chosen theme. There is nothing to say more it is good track overall for any type of use.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -10,2 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -11,8 LUFS
Integrated loudness -14,0 LUFS
Loudness range 5,7 LU
True peak L -2.59dB
True peak R -2.59dB
DC offset L +0.001% (-98.9dB)
DC offset R +0.001% (-99.1dB)
---------------------------------------
wishoff - Ready Set Glow
Will start with good things. I like the mix regarding frequency spectrum. Sounds do not interfere with each other and blend well together. There is good power and also stage in track.

Drums are strange in regards of sound but also pattern itself is weird. I will say the weakest part is beat that is almost annoying with that snare sound repeating in same rhythm over and over. It stick out too much and it almost have metronome feeling. Maybe some variation in dynamics will help but now it sound the same whole time. Almost like BB gun shooting. Some background sounds are nice but the track is ruined with that beat.

Nice idea that can be used as soundtrack but with adjusted or replaced rhythm part because it feels now more like bar fight scene because of that rhythm.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -8,7 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -10,9 LUFS
Integrated loudness -13,8 LUFS
Loudness range 7,0 LU
True peak L -0.83dB
True peak R -0.92dB
DC offset L -0.017% (-75.5dB)
DC offset R -0.016% (-76.1dB)
---------------------------------------
canese - Deutner
Not sure but whole track or most sounds have kind of weird combing artifacts. Kind of artificial widening applied, haas or something like that. It does not sounds good. At 1:38 when that plucky synth is playing there is additional swelling synth pad that looks it have have some phase cancellation and it almost disappear when played in mono. Also you keep too much reserve in peaks and overall loudness. So we have now not just loud track but also low volume track. I usually make playlist of tracks and keep listening them to compare, this way need to adjust volume too often and it is distracting.

Track fits the theme but composition is kind of "weak". There are four main parts that are very similar two of them are with that plucky lead and other two without but rest is almost the same. Transition from 1st to 2nd part is interesting so more parts like this will be welcome. Also that snare doesn't help here regarding repetitive sound. It is the same sound whole track, no dynamic changes it is also quite dominant and this machine gun effect is ruining the sound for me.

Same as I this style do not suite you well but I still find overall mix weakest part of track.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -16,3 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -18,2 LUFS
Integrated loudness -21,0 LUFS
Loudness range 3,6 LU
True peak L -9.22dB
True peak R -8.66dB
DC offset L 0.000% (-133.9dB)
DC offset R 0.000% (-129.9dB)
---------------------------------------
functionform - Arrival
Great intro. Like that ambient pad sound. It add nice contrast and make interesting mood to the track. Overall idea behind composition is nice but I feel many sound are used forcibly and are triggered kind of randomly especially in part starting at 3:00. Like you were just trying to incorporate them in track in order to meet genre criteria. Transition at 1:30 is sudden and pad sound is almost cut off. Drums after should have more complex pattern with some additional fills since that drum is played there exclusively solo.

That pad sound even it is nice have some problems. In intro there are some resonant peaks at around 300Hz and another around 1.4kHz that do not sound nice. There also some phase cancellation problem in that sound but nothing serious since it doesn't loose much power in mono. You also push loudness bit more that it should be and also true peaks do not have much reserve so additional compression when uploaded on stream service may add unwanted clipping artifacts.

Track fits more to some space shooter rather them racing game.

Statistics:
Max momentary loudness -6,8 LUFS
Max short-term loudness -8,7 LUFS
Integrated loudness -11,1 LUFS
Loudness range 4,7 LU
True peak L -0.26dB
True peak R -0.28dB
DC offset L +0.005% (-86.9dB)
DC offset R +0.005% (-86.9dB)
---------------------------------------
► Show Spoiler
I will make some break from music making since all my last track were done in hurry only because I do not want to skip music making but results was bad and unfinished in regards of mix but also composition. I do not have much free time because of work and my other more important hobby I have so I'm sure we will see each other later maybe in few months.
Double Tap
Posts: 23
Joined: Sat Aug 01, 2020 12:41 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#93

Post by Double Tap »

This was harder than I thought it would be and there's a lot of quality on show. Some people who ended up further down my list don't deserve to be so far down. And it really gave me a lot of food for thought about how I approach my stuff in the future.

The brief said it needed to be a “high intensity, pumping soundtrack rooted in the Drum n Bass genre”, particularly Hardstep, Darkstep and Neurofunk. The focus should be on an aggressive bass and a hard-hitting beat – focusing on things like Reeses, growls and drums.
I have to confess that despite having been a drum n bass fan since before it was called drum n bass, I’m not totally clear on the dividing lines between subgenres and I’m inclined to take them with a pinch of salt anyway – your view may differ. But in general I think a drum n bass track is mostly about the drums and the bass, and that the rest of it is colouring rather than the focus.

Richard Watashi - Ok Kill Me
Fits the brief? Not very much because it’s a bit slow for drum n bass and doesn’t have a drum pattern that fits. It doesn’t feel like a racing game.
Drum n bass elements? The bleepy melody could be adapted but otherwise it’s not quite there I’m afraid.
What would improve it? Better mixing to remove the distortion and tighter drum sounds. It feels as though the variation only happens from loop to loop, rather than in an organic way which develops through the song.
Overall? I think there are bits which could work but it needs a bit more attention.

Doc Jon - Gridlock
Fits the brief? Mostly. It drove the track on and had some good sci fi elements to it. However, it felt a bit more like techno with a drum n bass backbone and didn’t quite have the edge that often comes with drum n bass.
Drum n bass elements? They are all there: a good drum pattern and a nice bassline.
What would improve it? More silence, or more space at least. It felt busier than it needs to be for the genre. A lot of bass sounds in the genre are quite percussive rather than melodic and it felt that your obvious ear for melody may diverted you. Also I didn’t feel as though you developed through the track, more that it followed a verse-chorus structure rather than an evolving sound.
Overall? On its own terms, this was very good and well put together, but felt a bit too far from the brief to get top marks.

Jorgeelalto - Afterburner
Fits the brief? Really well. It felt like it was bang on brief and had a bit of menace, a good pulse and a great overall sound.
Drum n bass elements? Classic bass sounds, good rhythm - all there.
What would improve it? Even on repeated listening, that kick still sounds slightly off. It could be my ears. Also, on repeated listening, I wonder if you could bring the snare down a bit compared with the rest of the drum pattern. Finally, even though you use space very well, you could potentially cut more (eg reducing the length of the bass sounds in the second half) to get make even more room in the track.
Overall? Apart from the point about the kick, I really enjoyed it.

TrojakEW - Not Fast Enough
Fits the brief? No need to rake over it again: a bit slow for the genre, but does have plenty of good bass sounds. After about the third listen I was was reminded a little bit of the Sisters of Mercy (That’s not a bad thing - This Corrosion is a classic https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-RVJyNpfDk )
Drum n bass elements? The drums are mostly there for the genre. The bass is more on the techno side to me.
Improvements? I think my criticisms are almost entirely about genre rather than skill with either melody and harmony or technology. I do still think though that it felt too restrained and crafted, and not rambunctious enough.
Overall? As a piece of music, it’s very well done. It feels like it would work in a movie soundtrack.

Gyorgy Becsei – Midnight Run
Fits the brief? Completely. Really good in my view. Great bass sounds, great sense of being propelled on and I’m a sucker for a bit of opera (is that from Splice?) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UO38uoBUIMk Also the 8 bit video game sound is subtle.
Drum n bass elements? Good bass noises, particularly the one that arrives at 00:45. The pattern works for the genre.
Improvements? Later on you filter that bass sound I think, and that’s why it feels as though there’s some low end missing – I’m not sure if you replace it with something else but I can’t hear anything. Also, I’m not sure the length of the snare sound works with the pattern you’ve chosen. That long snare works really well on the three, but the syncopated beats get slightly muddled. I would suggest swapping them for a different, shorter sound which would achieve the same rhythm but more cleanly.
Overall? Really good.

J.Ruegg - HyperBoost
Fits the brief? Totally.
Drum n bass elements? Everywhere.
Improvements? Just that point about delivering on the teases. I wonder also if you could give yourself slightly more space at some points. When I compare it to eg Full Kontakt – The Creeper or Noisia – Exodus, there is more room in their tracks than yours, and more opportunity to savour the sounds.
Overall? An impressive drum n bass track.

OlliH – GateKeeper
Fits the brief? Not as much as it could – the drums are more of a rock pattern than drum n bass. But it does take off at 00:55.
Drum n bass elements? When it takes off, you get some great bass going – not sure if that’s with Massive or your guitar but it works. Otherwise it’s just a bit too far from what I’d expect.
Improvements? Have another look at the pattern. I enjoy the melody but I don’t think it fits this particular track, so I’d suggest you split this into two different songs and pursue them separately (if you’re inclined to do that).
Overall? Some nice bits but too far from the target for me.

Clueless - Upsidedown Insideout
Fits the brief? Yes and it has a good rhythm that drives the track forward.
Drum n bass elements? It has some great bass bits. The drums are definitely in the right area. There’s effective use of space and sound effects.
Improvements? The drum pattern gets a bit messy at times - same thing as I said about Gyorgy Becsei’s Midnight Run. The snare gets a bit muddled up when it syncopates and fills. You could separate those elements from the snare to achieve the same effect. The main thing I’d like more of is emotion – I can’t instantly say how you’d achieve that, maybe more builds? Silences?
Overall? It’s a good piece of drum n bass that I could imagine hearing in a mix.

The Exponent - Hyperdrive
Fits the brief? Mostly – the intro felt like it was on the edge of techno and then the beat kicks in and you’re into a nice bit of driving dnb.
Drum n bass elements? Surging bass that growls? Check. Pounding drums? Check.
Improvements? Once more, I’m calling for more space in the mix, and more development through the track. Even though it’s moved a long way from jungle, I think drum n bass has retained some of the dub reggae feel that set it aside from hardcore and techno in the first place, even though the bass has now become a many-headed hydra to terrorise our ears and the drums are much more polished. The great melodies and tunefulness of this track would be positives in other genres but less so in drum n bass.
Overall? I like it and it gets most of the way there for me.

Wishoff - Ready Set Glow
Fits the brief? Spot on. Love the time stretching effects in the percussion.
Drum n bass elements? Everywhere. Lovely effects. Great basses. The drums are clever.
Improvements? It could get going a bit earlier. The fade out from drum n bass to that half-step, almost hyperbeat effect is clever, but it has a side effect of slowing down the momentum of the track when it dominates, which it does in the second half. I’d like to hear what it sounds like with the fade out around 5:00 moved to earlier in the track.
Overall? Excellent techniques, some great details and a great track overall.

Canese - Deutner
Fits the brief? Yes just about. I think it’s a bit too tuneful in some ways but there’s certainly the basis of a good drum n bass track.
Drum n bass elements? Drums not quite there for me. The pattern works but the drum sounds are too weak. The bass at the drop around 1:00 is great and works well. The synths are too happy though.
Improvements? Beefier drums, less melody, more growls and an injection of terror.
Overall? There’s plenty to like in this but I’m struggling to love it.

Functionform – Arrival
Fits the brief? Completely.
Drum n bass elements? Love the intro. The drums are on point. Plenty of space to breathe. Great development through the piece. Nice light and shade. Loving that drum sound again. Kicks on at 1:30. Great.
Improvements? The only thing I can think of is a bit more motion in the stereo field. And that might end up being a bad thing.
Overall? Excellent.
► Show Spoiler
Olli H
Posts: 207
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2017 16:08 CET
Location: Finland

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#94

Post by Olli H »

Feel free to disagree with my comments and subjective opinions. You surely would be right, for I don't know anything about EDM nor racing nor computer games. So I have no real tools to estimate this months submissions, except my unupdated musically limited opinions from long gone decenniums.

I listened to all the submissions several times in several long walks. And later I ranked them based on the fact if I remember anything of them after one day. Or if I was somehow able to relate to them. That's how I get positions 1-6. About positions 7-12, I had no real way to put them in any reasoned order. So I think that it is unfair to me to be forced to make that order for compositions in a genre of which I don't understand anything. And even more unfair to you that I randomly put them in some order.



=========


Double Tap-Amen Break
Interesting opening. (0-34 s) Then it turns a little bit chaotic, but suits fine with that busy funky drum line. Later (1:04-) long notes make the scene more relaxed. Maybe this could work as a music for some dark cave and tunnel races.
That drum sample contains funky rhythm pattern. It was originally played by great drummer Coleman in 1969. So, no doubt that it's quite different from typical modern dnb-grooves.
I think this has potential to go to more weird scenes. Just find some new directions for racers, and it will be great.
I still miss some added accents and fills from an electric drum kit. Some surprise fills after which it would be nice to return to the acoustic drum sound.


=========

becsei_gyorgy, midnight_run
This would work fine as a racing game music. I'd be glad to see my children play Mario cart with this music.
There's a lot of different motives and well-done transitions between them, so it would suit fine to changing scenes of futuristic carting.
Well, with choir part I had some difficulties. Those parts didn't create a flow of images in my head. But when one is working on the creative side, it's a good sign if some old fart like me doesn't get it.

=========

canese, Deutner
I like those chromatic bass lines. Or are they even smaller steps? That's the part that went deeper to my memory. But the synth line after those bass lines spoiled it to me.
Sounds like a game music to me but I don't get the racing feeling. Maybe it's those synth melody lines which makes me think that it's not about racing.

=========

DocJon, Gridlock
This one is definitely a racing track. Nice bass riff. I like the way you introduce new musical elements, just in right positions, and then come back to the already introduced elements. Maybe EDM is not your main area, but probably for that reason it's easier for me to relate to this song. And to remember it. For the tempo in which you bring new ideas and let them flourish is exactly something my old mind expects from the music.
I like those transitions, but maybe the energy level could be a tad stronger here and there. As if one is using only second and third gear of his powerful car.

=========

functionform, Arrival
Great and simple opening. (0-45 s) I like it's simplicity.
For some reason to me these instrument and musical ideas sound like animals talking. As if it's some sort of happy animal meeting. There were pigs, donkeys, dogs and gooses, maybe some other also. But I like it, or I like it for that very reason. But where's the racing?

=========

J.Ruegg, HyperBoost
Cool main riff. The more I listen to it, the more I like it. This is probably the only strongly EDM based submission that I'm able to relate to musically. But I didn't get any racing feelings. For me it would be great tune to some James Bond inspired agent/action game. I miss some musical development. It surely has some changes, but it still feels a bit static. On the other, it's good all the time.

=========

Jorgeelalto, Afterburner
Sounds definitely great with a coherent mood all through the song.
Transitions could be bigger. Now I'm getting feeling that brakes are on all the time.

But from the point of view of this competition's theme, I don't find any moody raceing aspects in this. It feels too analytical and elliptic. Maybe it would suit some dinghy boat raceing where there's no big accelerations, etc.

=========

Richard Watashi, Ok Kill Me
Wild thing. Maybe not at all dnb, but rhis one has serious raceing feelings. Surely, this game is not for cowards like me, but this is for those who understand that games are the real thing in life. Kill or be killed. It is very hypnotic. And it dives deeply into emotional levels. In this case I'm not missing musical variations or bigger changes, although there are none. To make something hypnotic is a special skill.
I like those distorted drums. Maybe otherwise too much of distortion here and there, but for some reason it doesn't bother me. But I would like to hear the bass line more clearly.

=========

The Exponent, Hyperdrive
Great sound, no doubt about that. I like the piano riff, but the synth melody line distracts me from the interesting opening. It reminds me of 80's, the time I couldn't stand synths. (Hopefully I've grown out of those all-knowing teenager years.)
It has some raceing feelings, but personally I don't feel the heat of racing moments. So from that point of view, it would be perfect for some tv-documentary with voice overs about the history of computer games.
Musically this doesn't have any hooks that my demented mind could remember.

=========

TrojakEW, Not_Fast_Enough
Great sound as always. But I don't find the raceing feeling. But some sort of danger is in there.
I get a feeling that it's Friday night and I'm walking in downtown areas where I should not be.
Musically interesting experiments to combine choir with EDM. But for some reason it distances me even more from raceing mode.
You do make absolutely great stuff always, as I have many times noticed. After these months I have a noticed that in the blast of creativity, I guess, you - like me - have a tendency first make the song and later check if it fits competition theme.

=========

Clueless, Upsidedown_Insideout
Basic riff great.
But while listening to this I don't get any raceing feeling. I feel that I'm moving blindly in some monster cave. It would be great for that kind of scene
Musically a bit static. Full of nice small nuances, but it feels to me that there's not too many transition moments or compositional changes.

=========

Wishoff, Ready Set Glow
I think this has best and most promising start.
But in the long run the drum riff is too dominating. It doesn't give room to those musical ideas you've added. So, despite them, this begins to feel too static. I would change to simplified drum pattern here and there, to let your musical ideas shine, and then come back with the main riff with added new elements.
After the slow part, the main theme could come with stronger energy.

=========

► Show Spoiler
User avatar
The Exponent
Posts: 98
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Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#95

Post by The Exponent »

I wonder if there's any point following the competition brief/theme/genre while composing songs for this community, looking at the feedback :D One of the reasons I rarely participate here anymore. But given that I made my track in less than 5 hours, I think I didn't waste much of my time. Anyway.

All the best everyone, good stuff.
Clueless
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Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#96

Post by Clueless »

I find this to be the hardest part of the competition, my judgement is just my feelings based on what I hear.
The way this challenge is setup I would prefer not to be the arbiter of what is what.
Shame we don’t have a panel of people(Yes, we do the competitors!!)

Oh well, here’s my feedback, some may not like it, just remember, I am just one person giving an opinion, so please don’t take it personally, use this experience as a whole to have fun and get feedback ;)


Orchestral edit
This has got some really good movements & the sound selection reminds me of early DnB which is a good thing in my view
I can’t get over the constant click, where the sample hasn’t been spliced correctly, seems to be a bit of a distraction
Overall a really enjoyable ride, although it didn’t completely scream Futuristic race game, it still kept me entertained :)

TrojakEW
Starts out interesting, then I think I’m hearing more of a big beat style track, it doesn’t have the pace and energy which is DnB, despite this it’s still interesting, the singing adds a dramatic twist and it is very well mixed, if not a bit under aggressive.

The Exponant
Starts interestingly, the build up has a good feeling to it, beat kicks in and the snare seems a bit too Tom like, seems to flatten the track too much, maybe a rattle of some kind intermingled with it would help to lighten it a bit. Has all the the elements, It’s a well constructed track with a lot of positives and the mix sounds good.

Doc Jon
It’s got an interesting start with some good sounds and the beat hits hard, I seem to get a bit confused by all the little detail elements, it seems to have one pace and that’s flat out, there isn’t any relenting in this.

Canese
Starts well and starts to build, probably more aggressive in that section would help to throw it forward, interesting sound selection and has a nice flow, possibly a bit more bass would assist in the track overall, apart from having to turn it up the mix seemed pretty good :)

Functionform

Interesting start, very spatial, beat seems to mix the criteria, has a dark side, reminds me of metalheadz
When it hits, it hits, love the snare, holds it space well, possibly a little bit of variation would help, seems a little bit too consistent, when the bass kicks in the third section it has a lot of energy, it would have been good if the beat developed a touch, with some little throw away section
Overall a good mix :)

J.Ruegg
Atmospheric start, beat is fairly aggressive and matches the bass quite well, the second beat entering doesn’t seem to hold as much power, seems fairly flat and isn’t really complimentary to the other elements which seem to be the main stars in the production, it seems to be a bit confused as to what it wants to do, I’m waiting for it to explode and it just keeps building
Overall mix is good with the beat the just not being enough to handle the fine bass display

Jorgeelalto

Starts interesting with a goldie vibe to it, then it hits hard, with some cool little perc flying around, builds upon itself nicely and continues to get more interesting with good elements throughout, the only thing which let it down for me was no memorable presence, I heard it, but nothing really stuck in my head, overall a really good track and mix.

OlliH
Starts very whimsical, has the right beat, I’m not really one for guitars in this genre, but you pulled it of really well, has an odd feeling to it, this to me is an interesting interpretation of DnB, a few elements seem to clash as it progressed, a few volumes were off a touch, I wouldn’t say it’s a race game music but I liked it nonetheless :)

Richard Watashi
Wow, this starts of interestingly, maybe a bit too slow, but you have quite a few drums elements in competition:)
Bass doesn’t get much of a look in unfortunately , however it’s interesting in the way it’s put together, more abstract in its composition and has a big beat feeling to it, I really liked it though :)

becsei_gyorgy

It’s very quirky in its sound elements, taking from various styles, has a very freestyle feel to it, maybe a bit confused overall, less elements and shorter would possibly help it overall
Nothing sticks out too much in the mix but some of the styles do compete with one another.

Wishoff

Starts with a nice bounce and interesting elements, breaks into a nice atmospheric bass section, sadly it doesn’t play upon the energy you created when it first starts, maybe more than a day’s production would have helped ;)
Mix seems pretty good, possibly in future comps a little longer would see a more formed piece :D
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Doc Jon
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Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#97

Post by Doc Jon »

I found the theme interesting this month as I know very little about drum’n’bass. All in all a fascinating learning experience and definitely widening my horizons. Having said that I’m not sure how accurately I can judge the drum’n’bass elements of each track, and I tended to be guided more by whether it sounded like a game soundtrack and whether I could imagine racing along with the music. I also liked the more melodic arrangements which I thought fitted more with the game soundtrack brief, even if not typical for pure drum’n’bass

Richard Watashi - Ok Kill Me
I like the distorted drums, in fact I’m always a fan of this type of percussion, but it can become wearing after a while and I think often works better as a breakdown section rather than the whole track. Tempo a little too slow, but sounded like a great soundtrack for a trendy grindhouse movie
I did like the change at 1:30, I can imagine driving along to this but by the end of the track the continuous distortion did get a bit too much and I would have liked some quieter sections to break up the track to add some variation

Jorgeelalto - Afterburner
Nice track, good chilled build at the start with some nice percussive elements. Great bass coming in at 0:44, sounds like drum’n’bass to me and a good clean mix
Car seemed to be sitting in the pits until about 0:44 then we were out on the track and I could definitely imagine driving fast to this
Nice building synth sounds in the section from 1:08, chilled again from 1:30, then foot down at 2:14 and back to the build at 2:35. I would have perhaps liked even more energy going into the final section rather than dropping back to the chilled sound again but that’s the only negative I can find here, great track

TrojakEW - Not Fast Enough
I could certainly imagine playing a racing game to this soundtrack, although probably staying well within the speed limit rather than going too fast! Having said that the tempo didn’t really bother me and I found the energy in the track to be more than enough to keep up the driving vibe
I did not think the choral chants and brass section worked as well as the rest of the track, not really fitting with the drum’n’bass feel
Overall nice arrangement, great mix and really excellent use of stereo field
I liked the final touch with the drop at the end

Gyorgy Becsei – Midnight Run
Great start and I liked the way the rhythm fades in, good section from 0:44
Nice production with the drum and bass well defined and separated in the mix
I wasn’t so sure about the choral sounds as I felt they didn’t fit so well with the genre
The rest of it however all sounded authentically drum’n’bass to me
Good clear mix and well constructed track
Running time maybe a little long at just over 6.5mins but overall a nice driving theme and a good track

J.Ruegg - HyperBoost
Impressive track, some great sounds and fits very well with the feel of a driving soundtrack
Some very interesting choices of sounds in the track and I liked the variation of textures you used, the heavier section from 0:45 was particularly good
There were some lovely little touches and ‘ear candy’ elements within the arrangement which were particularly effective (such as the panning car sounds at 2:49), the whole track seemed very well constructed
My only negative comment - sounds very loud and over compressed compared to the other tracks (particularly when so many of us were striving to hit that -14 LUFS target) which made the mix feel a little more cluttered than it should have been - the only thing that kept it off the top spot

OlliH – GateKeeper
Not particularly drum’n’bass in its feel but there were some good authentic sounds in there and the guitars worked really well
Could I imagine driving along to this? Yes, from about 0:54 onwards I did get that feel
I did like the change at 1:22 and the following section very much, this would have made a great basis for a complete track in itself, albeit in a different genre

Double Tap – Amen, brake
Authentic drum’n’bass feel, I liked the use of the amen break and the different ways in which you incorporated it. There was a definite racing feel to the whole track
Lovely break at 2:30 leading into a nice relaxed section at 2:36 building back up to the main theme at 3:10
Nice arrangement and good clear mix
Not much to criticize at all here really, very well done
…oh and an extra point for the title

Clueless - Upsidedown Insideout
Nice rhythms throughout and a good clean mix
I found the arrangement a little sparse but I did like your choice of bass sounds, particularly the formant style bass that you used from 1:56 onwards
Can definitely picture myself racing along to this track

The Exponent - Hyperdrive
Lovely opening section, lovely piano, and really felt like a driving track once the beat kicks in at 0:46
Sounds genuinely like a game soundtrack to me
I liked the more melodic elements that you included which I thought worked well alongside the more traditional drum’n’bass components
I loved the breakdown section at 1:56 and then the progressive build right through to the end
Good clear mix with every sound well defined and sitting comfortably in its own place, three and a half minutes of pure joy

Wishoff - Ready Set Glow
Really well produced professional mix, good bass and percussion definition
We’re straight out of the pits by 0:11 and racing away. I did find the rhythm you chose sometimes sounding more half time however rather than full time due to the emphasis on the alternate beat cymbal sounds
I found the quieter sections perhaps a little too empty and sparse and enjoyed the louder sections more, I would have liked some more melodic elements for a game soundtrack but I appreciate that is my personal choice and probably not true drum’n’bass
Very good soundtrack music, possibly more suited to a film than driving game because of the underlying half speed rhythm feel

Canese - Deutner
I do like this, mainly because it has a very 80s feel to it, but probably not fitting very well with the brief for this month
Game soundtrack? Definitely yes, although more 80s than drum’n’bass
Racing track? Possibly not, the issue here I think is the drums which sound authentically 8 bit but not really strong enough to carry the track. I think it would have worked better with a drum loop or stronger distorted drum sounds. It also needed heavier and more prominent bass sounds
I liked the build and drop at 2:14
Mix is fine but I would have liked more weight in the low end

Functionform – Arrival
Great sounds, the change at 1:30 blew me away, very good
Sounds authentically drum’n’bass to me, I liked the contrast in the different snare sounds between the softer and louder sections
Loved the atmos sounds throughout the track, you could almost say ‘sponsored by Roland!’
Good production and mix but a little hot on the loudness front
Not particularly racing themed however, I couldn’t really imagine driving along to this

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Mister Fox
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Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#98

Post by Mister Fox »

A friendly reminder:
We're in the final 24 hours of posting some final words of encouragement, and cast your vote.
J.Ruegg
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Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#99

Post by J.Ruegg »

My comments :

functionform

It starts good, setting the ambience and everything. but then around the 1:34 minute mark I think some background effects could give a nice touch, maybe risers (very subtle) but giving the feel of constant acceleration... maybe even a shepard tone could help.
Otherwise, production is very good, on mixing & sound selection.

wishoff

Very solid percussion and low end, but on the highs I feel like the hats are clashing too much with the snare.
Also, it's a weird rythm for drum and bass, but works somehow.
Overall, it sounds too "dry" to my taste, but probably the videogame would have other sources of sound for ambience, so it could fit well I think.

canese

Drums sound a little too weak, a harder snare, and more high percussion (shakers & hats) could make it much better, giving it more movement.

Sound selection could be better too imo, and maybe add some filter modulations to the bass to give it more life.

The Exponent

Intro sounds great, I would just maybe added a bit of variation and/or more swing to the hats.

The melody lead on the drop could have a little more highs I think.

Overall I like it very much, and it's impressive what was done (taking into account the few hours you had).

Clueless

First, I think the drum sounds could be replaced with something more "aggresive", it would fit better imo.
The track lacks life, maybe adding some fills, or drum breaks could help a little.
And maybe going a bit more adventurous wiht the bassline.

Double Tap

The background effects on the start, sound a bit off, using more sparsingly could have worked.

Sound selection could be improved, adding a synth arp would have made it more interesting.

Overall, the drums feel a bit too hectic and chaotic, I think it would have worked better having a common rythm, and using those breaks as drum rolls.

Olli H

Solid drums, hats & shaker could be improved imo, playing it at double speed to give a more energic feel.
The ambience of the track could also get some work I think, adding a bit more background sounds to glue together some sections.

Overall, I like much more than the previous version I listened. :)

becsei_gyorgy

Drums could sit better in the mix, also the hats could get a little more presence.
Something feels a bit off on the bassline, I think the melody progression should be different. But can't really explain in what way, I don't know much about music theory.
The second parts adds enough variation to keep the track in motion.


TrojakEW

This sounds very well produced, so, I don't really have any complaints.
Just that it doesn't fits well in the genre.

Jorgeelalto

You got some sick sounds on this.
Overall you nailed it pretty much.
I would maybe just added a synth arp to the drop to give it more urgency.
Quality track man.

Doc Jon

There is an annoyin effect on the background, I think it could work but at half tempo, and more in the background, and having the hats&shakers being the energy drivers of the beat.
Other thing that I don't think sounds good is the reese, it could be a bit more detuned to get the classic feeling, also making variations on it's filter movement would make it much more alive.
It sounds like you wanted to replicate the dissonance of a reese bass using filter modulation. That effect is archived with 2 detuned saw waves (about a half tone separated).

J I L L I A M

The distortion used at the start, is a bit too harsh.
The bass also sounds too muddy on the mix.

Overall, it sounds too "dry", adding more sounds could help to give it more life & flow, and maybe changing the melody to make it more engaging.
Lot's that could be improved.


Votes:
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Richard Watashi

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC036 August 2020 - Voting until 03-SEP-2020 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#100

Post by Richard Watashi »

You all are tallented! Great entries.

Doc John: Sounds just good. I like what you did with the bass tweaking. I am not sure about the melodical elements here. Idk.

7th Pyramid: Starts pretty easy listening. And it seems to remain like this. It is light. I like the bass - sounds dope a bit.

TrojakEW: Great percussions.. sounds good overall. This sounds as a racing game OST, not my track. I just think using vocal libraries is a cheap method, haha. Sorry..

Gyorgy Becsei: I never heard this ducking style of a bass as is in the intro. : D Than you turn some freaky tweaky standard with the bass as you progressed. Well done.
The melodical part is here just to be here, but i am not certain of the sounds chosen for the melodies. You got a like from me also for the nintendo sound. The ending is a bit epically progressive.

J.Ruegg: Well, this starts and is overally dark. I like dark. Dark is cool, when it is dope. Good one man, good share. The bass, the drums, the darkness, i liked it all. Even the melodies were ok.

Olli.H: Yo, starts nice :) It sounds a bit less bass boosted for a DNB on my speakers. The mood is strange. Not bad at all. You handled the job well.

Double Tap: One of the cooler tracks imo. It is furious, it is dark, it is experimental.

Clueless: Frankly quite cool. You always hit in the red spot. Some sounds are just interesting to me. And it is interesting overally. Yea, i am not saying it because you raised me so high. I usually like what you do, when i hear you in the competition.

The Exponent: Yo bro, how are you ey? Yout piece here has good vibes. This is my favorite i think . Not because youre a friend, not at all. But your track i enjoyed most. It sounds far from naivity, it is epic and very easy to listen. And it is cool.

wishoff: Here with the drumming, you sound like DNB. But also like a Rock. :) Overally i think you have done a goood job! Well, just for the outro - idk it somewhat didnt convinced me.

canese: Sounds ok. After so many similar tracks, i am running out of ideas people. I can apreciate what you have done, though i have for some reasons my other favorites. I enjoyed it. :)

functionform: Yea, nice punchy drums, bass on a sicko mode, and even the darkness is here to please me. :D It sounds Ambiental at some parts. And the sings between the neuro and ambient parts works well.

Jorgelaito: Pretty decent stuff. quite hypnotical and spacey. You reached the standards. Mission acomplished.
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