SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC062 October 2022 - Winners announced

[Mister Fox]

It is the 25th October 2022, 0:25 UTC+2/CEST - this month's Songwriting Competition has official ended


STATISTICS:

• If I didn't miscount, we have 9 submissions this month (3 entries less than last month, but also 1 more than October 2021)
• We have 0 submissions after the deadline (as of 25-OCT-2022 0:10 UTC+2/CEST)
• We have 0 submissions that has been disqualified (production released outside of the game's timeframe)
• We have 0 submissions that have been withdrawn (but counts as entry within the deadline)
• The "staff balancing vote" add-on rule does not apply
• "Sole Winners Podium" rule (equal or less than eight participants results in a single winner) does not apply (3-position Winners Podium)

How do we go from there?

Over the course of the next (hopefully) 24-48 hours (usually up to 6-12 hours maximum after the game has ended), I'll gather all links into one post and hot-link to that from the first post of the thread. Please, no more changes to your entries, but please do check your links that these entries are downloadable. We then perform with the final feedback and "public vote" system.


We have 9 participants. Usually we would run the known "voting mechanic". However, this month we're trying something new, as talked about in the following news blog:

Songwriting Competition - game mechanic changes: Voting Process (October 2022 Update)


Summarized:
Participants can (and must) vote for their Top 5 entries. You're furthermore asked to please reflect on your experience this month (2-3 paragraphs max). However, you are also asked give feedback to at least three (number: 3), but no more than five (number: 5) entries that either stood out to you and you would like to provide some additional final thoughts, or where you could provide constructive feedback for possible improvements. These entries can be outside of your personal "top entry" voting.

The staff will not cast a balance vote, unless there is a tie that can't be broken (or if it would add a bit more spin to the game, see below).

The "Voting Process" mechanic is mandatory for all participants, and the only criteria to drop out of the game by not partaking. Please cast your vote (not the feedback) in collective form through the "spoiler text" bbcode. Please use the forum username of the participant to make it easier during the score collection to address what vote belongs to whom.
.

⚠	Moderation Message from Mister Fox
	For transparency: Due to time constraints, the staff (Mister Fox) will not give feedback to all entries and/or cast a vote this month.

Feedback from non-participants and/or collaborators is highly encouraged (voting not needed!). The same goes for entries after the deadline, or those that sadly do not count for the current running game (even if you've exceeded the deadline, why not post your entry regardless?). Musicians and Engineers are always after constructive criticism. This is what this forum is about.





Have some general feedback? Please provide that here:
Songwriting Competition - General Gossip Thread, or on Discord.



Please have an eye on this thread!

[Dear David John]

Thank you @KukoBass
Your feedback was very helpful and much appreciated.

[Mister Fox]

Let us kick off the VOTING PROCESS, which will end on Tuesday, 01-NOV-2022 23:59 UTC+1/CET latest


There is a GLOBAL COUNTDOWN to check for deadlines.
Just follow this link: Global Countdown (on homepage)



Here is the collection of productions from all participants (in hope that I didn't forget anyone). As usual, if you click on the small upwards-arrow right beside the quoted name, you can jump to the original post and read up on the documentation for this production.


.

"Surely Designed"

"Evergreen"

MP3: Google Drive playback and download

"Waiting For The Fall"



WAV: Google Drive playback and download

"I Want To Be A Leaf"

MP3: Google Drive playback and download
WAV: Google Drive playback and download

"Addicted"

"Hey You (feat. Laura Pistorio)"

WAV: Dropbox playback and download (last submitted version)


ADMIN INFO: Please check the original post regarding the initial entry and documentation. The upper linked song is the updated version from here (post editing would have been nice).

"Una Canço Com Qualsevol"

"The Sky Opens Up"

"Still You Care About Me"

WAV: Google Drive playback and download

.



BONUS ENTRIES (submitted after the deadline - feel free to give feedback, but you sadly can not vote for these entries)

"When Yellow Turns To Green"

WAV: Google Drive playback and download

<no bonus entries>
.



GAME MECHANIC SUMMARY:

► Show Spoiler

We are trying something new!

Please consult this news blog post regarding an overhaul to the voting mechanic. To make it simple for me for counting the votes - please use the forum usernames in your listing. Thank you!

Short Form:

• Please cast a vote for your top 5 entries
• Please reflect on your experience with this game (in 2-3 paragraphs tops)
• then..
  • either -- give some final thoughts on at least 3, but no more than 5 entries that stood out to you (general thoughts)
  • or -- give constructive feedback for at least 3, but no more than 5 entries that could see possible improvements (more technical - especially for, in your opinion, lower ranked productions)

.


This month's SWC participants giving feedback to each other is mandatory, it is the only criteria to drop out of the game by not partaking. If you have collaborated with somebody, then only the one doing the main entry needs to give feedback and vote. Bonus feedback is always welcome. However, please be open minded, objective and constructive.


INFORMATION: If you have submitted your entry in multiple file formats, the statistic sheet (posted alongside the results) will focus on the uncompressed material first (WAV), then FLAC, then MP3. The higher the quality (e.g. lossless format), the less possible loss on bonus points for "Loudness Specs" due to offsets introduced by a used CODEC.

Good luck to all participants!




If you have an idea for a future Songwriting Competition, please post about this in the theme/genre request page.

[KukoBass]

GAME MECHANIC SUMMARY:
We are trying something new!
...
Short Form:

• Please cast a vote for your top 5 entries
• Please reflect on your experience with this game (in 2-3 paragraphs tops)
• then..
  • either -- give some final thoughts on at least 3, but no more than 5 entries that stood out to you (general thoughts)
  • or -- give constructive feedback for at least 3, but no more than 5 entries that could see possible improvements (more technical - especially for, in your opinion, lower ranked productions)
  This month's SWC participants giving feedback to each other (to every participant) is mandatory, it is the only criteria to ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
  drop out of the game by not partaking. If you have collaborated with somebody, then only the one doing the main entry needs to give feedback and vote. Bonus feedback is always welcome. However, please be open minded, objective and constructive.

This ^^^^ is a little confusing. Do we have to give feedback to every participant or to 3-5 participants only?

[Mister Fox]

Oh... that paragraph section in the parentheses (rounded brackets) was an oversight. Apologies, happens if you post late at night.

You still have to give feedback to each other of course, but you only need to write something for 3-5 participants. See also this news blog post

[Crosshatched]

First, comments on others' pieces. (Thank you!)

► Show Spoiler

EsteveCorbera

Here it was the guitar in particular and also the drums and the rest of the instrumentation that got me in. Such a fun opening riff.

David John - Surely Designed -

Serious lyrics—I like the burning letter carrying a word— and I like the rhetoric of the music— how it builds up, how instruments or textures pull out or build up, how there is even a pause.

Arelem - Addicted -

The song and mixing are both done well, I think.
What I like:
the descending tick-tock percussion
the chill section in general is pretty slick and perhaps my highlight

Olli H - Still you care about me -

This is charming; yeah, I like something about the 'introspective sarcasm' lyrics, singing, and instrumentation is cool— the sour/sarcastic synths that come in, the raspy harmonization at the chorus. And there's some nice relief with some musical shifts. It's playful somehow. And I like the harmony in the chorus.

GamaGama - I Want to be a Leaf -

I really like the instrumentation and accompaniment writing, and it seems well mixed. Musically very enjoyable. Really loved the opening arpeggio intro.

The vocaloid is a bit hard to follow, however — going for a thin voice makes sense, and it could be interesting — but it really is weird and a bit hard to understand — but patience

EsteveCorbera - Una Canço Com Qualsevol -

I liked the energy and pattern of the opening guitar very much, and also appreciated the drums and the atmosphere provided by the rest of the instruments and harmony. It seems well done.

Now, attempts at rankings (not objective, and not much about mixing either):

► Show Spoiler

1st Olli H - Still you care about me
2nd KukoBass - Waiting for the Fall
3rd GamaGama - I Want to be a Leaf
4th patrlord Hey You (feat. Laura Pistorio)
5th EsteveCorbera - Una Canço Com Qualsevol

Reflections on my work process:

► Show Spoiler

I worked out 3 verses full of autumn woods based on a poetic form I was just learning, sijo. (And the music is not based on sijo, which is also a musical form.) These were fun, but they're not positively pop. Never mind; I didn't record them properly yet. Meanwhile, the chorus came light and easy, and is neither quite like the verses nor much like a sijo, but it fits the piece. Then there was the fun process of putting these onto notes, and then the grueling one of imposing musical rhythms on them. So there's manuscript paper for unrhythmic notes, and lined paper for rhythms, and finally manuscript paper for the actual music.

I came up with some shifting harmonies, but mostly these were slow moving chords— not much textural interest here, and only vocals and piano. Recording the chords in time is too hard somehow, and even then I manually adjusted some of them afterward (particularly in the verses). I do want to play the accompaniment when I can. In singing, I didn't seem to be in the mood to breath properly or to use much of my high notes. I retconned the tempo of the chorus a bit to meet the vocals better— click track rubato stuff.

[Mister Fox]

This is a great start - thank you.

Although you gave feedback to 6 users (3 minimum to 5 maximum). However, since we're trying something new this month, no worries. You (as in every participant this month) can put every feedback commentary into the "Spoiler Tags", but you really only need to do that for the vote.


Bonus info for everyone:

I will consider the 1st Position to be the highest points. So 01st Position = 10pts, 02nd Position = 09pts, etc.
You can use either listing as known from previous months, I will make sense of it.

[ryanc]

I enjoyed participating in this month's contest. It's challenging and fun to work within such a short time-frame and within specific guidelines and parameters. Given the time constraints and an already busy life, I focus the majority of the time on writing, and give little thought to the production end of things. Seeing as this is a songwriting contest, I try to focus primarily on that element in my judging as well; I consider, (1) how well does the melody/lyrics align with the theme, (2) how well the song fits the assigned genre, (3) is the song well-written? My results, therefore, don't necessarily reflect my personal preferences, rather, my best attempt at judging objectively by those criteria.

Here's my feedback:
1. Still you care about me
Interesting and complex chord progression. Melody and instrumentation are interesting and engaging. Lyrics are fun as well and fit nicely with the theme. Song style also fits theme well.
2. Hey you
Interesting and pleasant vocal performance and production. Song style fits theme. However, the lyrics didn't seem to fit the theme.
3. I Want to Be a Leaf
Melody is interesting and the vocaloid is pretty neat. Guitar solo was great. The vocal melody got a bit repetitive and the vocaloid, though interesting at first, became a bit grating.
4. Surely Designed
Interesting lyrics, although they don't seem to fit the theme. I enjoy the instrumentation and the change of meter for the chorus makes for an interesting choice.
5. Una Canco Com Qualsevol
Nice vocal performance. The lyrics don't seem aligned with the theme. The drum beat is cool, but becomes repetitive and there isn't a very clear or interesting break/difference between the verse and the chorus.

Here are my rankings:
1. Still you care about me
2. Hey you
3. I Want to Be a Leaf
4. Surely Designed
5. Una Canco Com Qualsevol

[KukoBass]

My top 5 entries for this month's competition are:

► Show Spoiler

01 (10 points) RyanC "Evergreen"
02 (09 points) Dear David John "Surely Designed"
03 (08 points) GamaGama "I want to be a leaf"
04 (07 points) EsteveCorbera "Una Canço Com Qualsevol"
05 (06 points) Olli H "Still You Care About Me"

It was challenging for me to write something uplifting for a change. I feel that I work best with slow beats and minor chords. But I had a happy musical motif to start with. My challenge was to get to a finished song with intro, verses, a bridge and a different chorus part from that and to get that recorded somehow.

Also, I learned from this month's challenge is that voting doesn't get easier through the new mechanic. My first choice was clear, but to decide which songs will be where on the four other places was hard as always. On the other hand, having to give feedback only to between 3 and 5 entries makes the feedback part of the competition a lot easier for me.


The songs that stood out for me the most were

RyanC "Evergreen"
My first choice, because so many good parts are getting even better by working perfectly together in this song. The intro building up and then giving room to the first verse, the music behind the verses building up tension again. The rhythm feels upbeat, the melody is uplifting and matches the text.
I loved the "let's get quiet ..." pause (and that the bass player is the last one to go quiet - was that a bassist joke or just a musical choice?).
The rhythm of the piano chords in the chorus remind me of Labi Siffre's "It must be love" (the cover version by "Madness"). The playful piano solo before the second chorus is charming. The bass does what a bass should do: Be present enough to be enjoyable, but not too intrusive.
All in all, a wonderful example that a great song is more than the sum of its parts.


Dear David John "Surely Designed"
The music is sad and wasn't at all what I expected from "uplifting pop". But the song is simply beautiful!
The lyrics are deep and somehow comforting, like a warm blanket on a cold autumn day.


EsteveCorbera "Una Canço Com Qualsevol"
This song has some very interesting and complex harmonics. I love the string pads. The harmonic interaction between vocal samples and music is creating a musical tension that makes the song unique.
Not at all a "Song like every other"!


Olli H "Still You Care About Me"
The song sounds playful and happy. I like the concept of the lyrics and the tongue-in-cheek-humor.


patrlord "Hey You (feat. Laura Pistorio)"
Excellent vocals! Powerful song!
I had a hard time deciding if it should be in my five favourites or not.

► Show Spoiler

What missing for me was that the vocals did not get wider in the chorus. I would have expected the vocals to figuratively explode, sitting in front of the mix. On the contrary, the synths got louder than the vocals. Maybe some added vocal doubling, panned hard to left and right, would have done the trick.

[GamaGama]

This month's topic "forced" me to invent an adequate text: I'm not very good with English, indeed not at all, and I'm afraid there are many errors and imperfections. I have also tried to generate the voices using Vocaloid, which I think is a valid instrument from which I have probably asked too much: certainly in other musical genres it is much more effective. In my opinion it deserves to be studied better (as long as my trial version lasts ...)

Although not foreseen, I reported the feedback for all the songs, having noted them for my memory, I translated them with google and make them available. I think it can please the participants to have feedback anyway. Here they are:

► Show Spoiler

Dear David John "Surely Designed"
The piano part and the atmosphere are really effective: a great piece! The chorus that opens at 0:57 is really ok. I would have liked a more natural and "classic" piano tone and a voice with less effects and more natural. The bass could have been a little more lively, but on this last point it would be necessary to do some tests to assess that in fact the adopted bass solution is not actually the best. However, they are details: structure and atmosphere are very enjoyable.

ryanc "Evergreen"
The opening of the song reminds me of something, but I don't know what; maybe it will be the turn of the chords ... then comes the guitar riff with the drums that really capture. The intro is very nice but perhaps a little too long: when the voice "she She lei 's on fire ..." arrives with only bass drum and piano the atmosphere changes completely and then returns to repeat the riff with the next stop . A guessed and hit structure. Congratulations indeed. The bridge at 2:15 seems out of place and it seems to me that it spoils everything a bit. Fortunately, the riff and the melody picked up by the piano lead back to the very interesting atmosphere of the opening verse. Adjusted to the beautiful song the ending starting at 3:50. There is perhaps some small intonation problem on the voice: a small intervention of autotune can surely solve it without damaging it.

KukoBass "Waiting For The Fall"
Really nice and interesting the intro. The blocked guitar really takes! The sound of the synth I would have preferred more rounded. I believe that the "real" melody (the one that should be sung) should start at 0:27, and I would like it to be well identified by another sound (or singing). I didn't like the rhythmic design of the drumbox and the hanclaps, but maybe it's my idiosyncrasy towards synthetic handclaps. In my opinion it is a song developed at 70%, refining the remaining 30% it can be truly enjoyable.

Arelem "Addicted"
I very much appreciated the grace and expressiveness of the voice, not always so well defined and set in the genre. The atmosphere of the bridge at 0:56 with alternative vocals and choirs is also very interesting.

patrlord "Hey You (feat. Laura Pistorio)"
Very beautiful the voice and the expressiveness of Mrs. Laura Pistorio: many compliments !! (Just some micro imperfections to fix, but really micro). The part that starts at 0:52 is just amazing with exceptional interpretation! I hope someday she will want to sing one of my songs ...
The song develops flawlessly, and thanks to Laura's brilliant interpretation it takes it to a really high level.

EsteveCorbera "Una Canço Com Qualsevol"
One comment: I have heard songs with less imagination and attractiveness in albums by artists of high standing. This is to express my appreciation.

Crosshatched "The Sky Opens Up"
Unfortunately I don't understand: I heard a melody sung in a critical way on a precarious piano accompaniment. Is there something I'm missing?

Olli H "Still You Care About Me"
What a delightful, light and fun tune. The structures are perfectly defined in a particular and characteristic sound: the whole is very delicate and fresh. As always, congratulations!

and here are my preferred songs:

► Show Spoiler

1st patrlord "Hey You (feat. Laura Pistorio)"
2nd Olli H "Still You Care About Me"
3rd ryanc "Evergreen"
4th EsteveCorbera "Una Canço Com Qualsevol"
5nd Arelem "Addicted"