SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC012 August 2018 - Winners announced

[Mister Fox]

It is the 25th August 2018, 7:05am GMT+2/CEST - this month's Songwriting Competition has official ended

Thank you so much for your participation. We had 7 participants, which is 4 more entries compared to last month (3 entries).
The "staff balancing vote" add-on rule does not apply
"Sole Winners Podium" rule (equal or less than seven participants results in a single winner) does apply.

There were no productions submitted after the deadline




How do we go from there?

Over the course of the next (hopefully) 24-48 hours, I'll gather all links into one post and hot-link to that from the first post of the thread. So please, check your links again. Mistakes and hiccups do happen on the internet. We then perform with the "public vote" system.


We have 7 participants, those being: ollyaudio, MOA22, Nige, MarkS, Dr. Akula, donkey tugger, intuition
That means that each participant can vote for 6 tracks, the staff will not cast a balance vote

The Top 10 list (or Top 2 per participant rather) can look something like this:

01 (10 pts) - Mr Moon
02 (9 pts) - Mr Sun
03 (8 pts) - Mrs Venus
04 (7 pts) - Mr Mars and his companions
05 (6 pts) - Mr Hale-Bopp
06 (5 pts) - The Rings of Saturn

How your voting could look like, please take a look at these posts (sans the technical information):
viewtopic.php?p=2311#p2311
viewtopic.php?p=2478#p2478
viewtopic.php?p=2819#p2819



Please also take note of the Rules and Guidelines on giving feedback

Feedback from non-participants is highly encouraged (voting not needed!). Musicians and Engineers are always after constructive criticism. This is what this forum is about.



If you have an idea for a theme/genre or want to see a specific theme tackled in August, please voice your opinion here:
viewtopic.php?f=11&t=168



Please have an eye on this thread!

[Mister Fox]

Let us kick off the VOTING PROCESS, which will end on Saturday, 01-SEP-2018 11:59pm GMT+2/CEST latest


There is a GLOBAL COUNTDOWN to check for deadlines.
Just follow this link: Global Countdown (on homepage)



Here is the collection of productions from all participants:

"Mediative Jam"

WAV: https://drive.google.com/open?id=1bRiEu ... aVuxiGCOLv

"sagw6"

WAV: wav
MP3: MP3

"Flow Through"

WAV: https://www.dropbox.com/s/izllq0kjs2a7z ... h.wav?dl=0
MP3: https://www.dropbox.com/s/typev110s2jkr ... h.mp3?dl=0

"Evening Seaside"

WAV: link to the audio

"Constant Repeat - Savage"

WAV: https://www.dropbox.com/s/prv5nmu65m8az ... 9.wav?dl=0

"Surplus Value"

MP3: http://www.bennyleeds7.myfreeola.uk/swc ... -value.mp3

"Jammed Toe"

MP3: https://www.dropbox.com/s/lrdcpma398cl0 ... n.mp3?dl=0

Please consult this post of how your vote could look like. Alternatively, the last post (which links to more sources).

Keep in mind, this month's genre was "free to select". So comparing tracks to each other is no simple feat. To make it easier on yourself, and more helpful for each participant, maybe focus on the overall production value. What you really liked with the song, what you'd like to see improved, etc.

Good luck to all participants!

[MarkS]

Here is my top for this contest:

01.donkey tugger-10 points
02.Moa22-9 points
03.intuition-8 points
04.ollyaudio- 7 points
05.nige-6 points
06.Dr.Acula-5 points

For participants i have some words, though i am not a mixing engineer or some professional music producer.

Donkey tugger, your song needs to be longer because, you often have to press on repeat to listen it . In general
it is catchy. There is a feel of summer ending, when you listen to it.

Moa22, i think you need to add a bit of reverb to vocals in verses, in chorus vocals are ok. The song as whole piece
is full of summer energy.

Intuition, your song should be an OST to an action movie or action scene from a movie . I don't think that you need to
change something in your song.

Ollyaudio, my idea is to add a bass instrument to your song. The piano or the percussion in song uses bass frequencies or
bass place. Try to cut these frequences from them. The oriental or asian summer is very
interesting for this song.

Nige, your song is good too, but i think it needs a new instrument. Should it be a piano, synth or strings, it is up to you.
This change will make it more interesting.

Dr.Acula, i think your can add some reverb to vocals too and the rest is pretty good.

[MOA22]

Here is my vote :

1st (10 pts)

donkey tugger : I definitely love your voice ! So subtle and simple too. Your production makes me consider to collab with you, seriously. Too short, very too short !!!!!! CONGRATS

2nd (9 pts)

Nige : Nice classic rock song ! Fresh one ! Nice production too, just maybe needs something more, like an Organ or something like that. BTW sounding like a kind of jam ! Congrats !

3rd (8 pts)

Dr.Acula : sounds like a jam yes. The song is pretty good ! Enough good to deserve a better (studio) production, the drums sound too MIDI for me. Guitars are fine, vocals too ! BTW your song fits perfectly in the contest ! Congrats

4th (7pts)

intuition : something like a video game soundtrack ! Nice drums ! Congrats too !

5th (6 pts)

MarkS : Summer ! Loved the atmosphere of it ! Not really the minimalism. With some upfront drums, it could sound better, just a kind of taste !

6th (5 pts)

ollyaudio : Your song needs more articulation and changes for me. But loved the oriental/folk vibes.


About my song, I must admit that even if I had just the time to finish the record before going to vacation,
my intent was not to propose it for the contest...

[intuition]

Ok, here is my vote.

1st-10 points
MOA22 "sagw6": Great song. It's hard to imagine how this could have been a metal song. Mixed well, although the vocals are a little dry in the verses, and the choruses lack definition ever so slightly. I don't think your voice is harsh at all. You did a great job with Logic Drummer. It's completely adequate for this kind of song and you programmed it very well. My only real criticism is the drum and guitar parts during the break were boring, like you didn't know what to write for them and just put something in for filler. Also you don't need so much bass drum during the break. Great usage of the extra measure before the final chorus. Vocals are clear "enough" throughout for a song in this genre but I wish you'd have posted the lyrics because I can't make everything out. Extremely catchy. I found myself singing the chorus after a single listen through. Clear winner for me despite my issues with the bridge.

2nd-9 points
Nige "Flow Through": Superb intro. I'm not well versed in this genre but this seems like some pretty standard southern rock ZZ Top style stuff. Vox are mixed extremely well. Guitars and drums all sound great. I don't like the fight/die bridges though (I think both the lyrical content and the arrangement used there are boring and overdone) and personally I find the song a little boring with the sparse arrangement and the low BPM. It's just not a genre I enjoy but I am trying not to dock you too much for that . The last half of the song fits the jam theme really well, although I wish it were more overall than just drums, guitars, and vox. Very professionally produced although pretty loud (-8.0 LUFS). I had to turn it down.

3rd-8 points
donkey tugger "Surplus Value": Constantly changing, so the structure is hard to follow, but it's a great piece. Haunting. I wish you'd posted the lyrics! The only part that doesn't work for me is the break at 1:04-1:08. It's not long enough and the pieces come back together in a disjointed way. The mix is mostly serviceable although it gets a little hard to hear everything that's going on toward the end and it lacks that professional sheen. Also the song is just too darn short! I know it's not what you were going for but there are plenty of ideas here and if you gave the song a little more structure it'd easily cross the recommended 3:00 minimum mark and would also help it feel more like a complete and satisfying song to listen to. As it is it's done before I'm ready to be done with it!

4th-7 points
Ollyaudio "Meditative Jam": The pitch bends on the synth at the beginning and the African drums throughout are great. Plenty of interesting parts and voice changes to keep the listener engaged. Unfortunately I think the synth wore out its welcome by the 2 minute mark or so. The piano parts are great and guitar parts are good. I'm not sure the last half of the song adds a whole lot but it's a jam so it's not unwelcome. Mix was well-done, no obvious errors. Everything clear and well-defined.

5th-6 points
Dr. Acula "Constant Repeat - Savage": I like it when the the guitar parts dance between the speakers - this is something that could EASILY be gimmicky and overdone but you incorporate it just enough to make it interesting without overstaying its welcome. Well done on that part. Overall the production isn't great, as it sounds closer to a garage demo than a commercial track. The vocals in particular are the weakest link for me. Lead vocals always need to be ridden or at least compressed to retain intelligibility, while these lead vocals fluctuated in level too much to be easily understood. They also had some pitching issues. Aside from the vox, the mix has some trouble holding up during the parts toward the end with a lot of bass drum but is otherwise servicable. Nice jam session at 3:10 and good ending.

6th-5 points
MarkS "Evening Seaside": The soundscape you're going for is nice and relaxing but I got tired of the bass quickly and the piece suffers from not having a wider range of note velocities on most (or maybe all) of the instruments. I feel like it could be a great emotional piece with a more human touch.

Congrats all. This was a lot of fun!

[ollyaudio]

01( 10 ) - donkey tugger
02 ( 9 )- Moa 22
03 ( 8) - Dr. Acula
04 ( 7) - Nige
05 ( 6) - Marks
06 ( 5) - intuition
1/ donkey tugger -
My soul flew. I miss you a lot. Great job.
2/ Moa 22 -Drive. The music was very inspirational. Beautiful vocals, stylish music. Super.
3/ Dr. Akula -
This is what is called jam. Great bass and improvisation. But so flew for the Donkey tugger, that I did not give you a chance to win.
4/ Nige -
It's too noisy for me. Perhaps the mood was closer to nostalgia. I liked Peter Gabriel)
5/Marks -Great composition, but I did not see the development. I would like your music to flow like a river.
6/ intuition -
This is great music for video. A wonderful instrumental, but not jam. So it seemed to me.

I want to apologize for maybe the wrong phrases. I translate in Google from Russian into English. All good!

[donkey tugger]

Too short..!? Pfft, 'Panic' by the Smiths is 2 mins 21, 'A Hard Day's Night' about the same, I could go on (and usually do.... ). I rest my case! Always leave em wanting more, and don't outstay yer welcome....!

Anyway, onto the serious bizness and ting...As always a lot of this is personal opinion, so don't take it too, err, personally...



MOA22 - Liking the understated nature of the drums and guitar in the start - reminds me a bit of my favourite period of The Cure (around 'Faith'). That's a nice chorus there. I'd cut the length of the first one in half though - build it up. When it comes in the second time I'd make it a bit more hooky by stripping the bass and ride for the first time round so it's a bit unexpected and more of a contrast. If you were feeling particularly adventurous and also confident about the vocal I'd also think of having just a couple of lines of the vocal right at the end on it's own as well - very bare with no reverb etc, so it sounds like you're in the room with the listener. Good stuff all round - 10

Nige - As usual some good quality rokk from you, which I always enjoy. I'm always a sucker for some twin lead axe, like that little Judas Priest bit at the start - as usual, quality geetar playing. I think the arrangement is about spot on for what you're going for. Mix wise (and in common with some other stuff I've heard of yours before) it's nice and clear, but lacking a bit in the, err, 'oomph' at the bottom end - that kick drum is bit weedy for 'eavy rokk - think of Mr Bonham and mix it again! - 9

Dr Aucla - An actual live jam! Nice tight playing, and the drum replacement has gone well. I did find it a bit long for what it is - perhaps cut one of the verse/chorus iterations? Don't know if you're the singer or not? Vocal is in tune (which is always a good start I find!) but it seems a bit pedestrian it that it quite rigidly follows both the rhythm and the chords. A bit of work on the phrasing/melody would take it to another level. I know a lot of 'rockers' would balk at this, but personally I've learned so much about singing from listening to such soul greats like Marvin Gaye, Al Green etc and how they phrase vocals. I now know what I want to do , just can't fucking sing it. -8

Intuition - A bit video game-y? Not that I've played any for years! For me it's crying out for a vocal - or if not, the lead guitar needs to be a lot more over the top to compensate and give something to grab the attention. Mix is fine, but sounds a bit 80s to me (maybe what you're after?) in that there's loads of reverb. . If it were me I'd cut it back quite a lot and go for a much more in your face sound. It's probably a good thing that I don't mix a lot of of other people's music... -7

Ollyaudio - Interesting stuff. Doesn't really take off at any point though, more variations on a theme really, which as a 'meditative' piece is possibly the point. That sinthesiser theramin-y type sound is very loud comparatively though for me. - 6

Mark S - I get what you were going for here with the sparse arrangement, and that it needs to be quite loose, but some of the timing (piano more than anything) did sound just a bit too out so it distracts from the mood. There's the basics of a good ambient piece in here, but I think it needs a lot of arranging and some tightening up - 5

[Nige]

10 pts -Donkey Tugger - From start to finish I thought this concise little number was just great. The stabbing guitars really give a positive forward momentum and kind of remind me a bit of early Coldplay before they turned to shit. Nice vocal performance, and I like the way they don't dwell or linger on any part long enough to feel samey or repetitive. The whole piece evolves beautifully from start to finish.
The high production value topped it off for me, nice work bro.

9 pts -Moa - As per usual with Moa, not much to fault with this one tbh, it's all played really competently and the production's on point. The synths that come in mid way through the 1st verse were a really nice touch.
Personally I would have cut the 1st chorus in half and leave the listener wanting more of that great hook later down the track. Also for me, the outro seemed to get a little lost from the 4:20 mark and just plodded through to it's conclusion. I think a bit more work could have been done vocal-wise to make this section a lot stronger and more engaging. Top effort.

8 pts -Dr Acula - A bass solo in the outro, well there's something you don't hear everyday, but it worked;-)
It's all played well enough and the guitars sounded nice and meaty with lots of presence. Nice vocal performance for the most part but could have benefited from a bit of a lift in overall level just so they're sitting on top of the mix a bit more.
The interlude at 3:00 was especially cool with the little note run parts.
The stop start nature of the intro wasn't really doing it for me. When I hear a pick slide in the build up it usually means the song is underway, but to turn round and do it again is dare I say a bit cheesy.
All in all definitely captured the "jam" band spirit.

7 pts -Intuition - First thing that springs to upon hearing this was that old arcade game Outrun.
It's all put together well enough and I think you've arranged the piece in such a way that it keeps the listener engaged, although personally I would have mixed the drums a little more up front.
As a background tune it's a winner all day long, but I'm not really sure it holds it's own as a stand alone composition and just feels like it's missing something.

6 pts -MarkS A fun little abstract piece that certainly evoked feelings of summertime with the nice use of sweeping sound effects.
I can't say there was much to this composition that got my juices flowing and tbh, felt a bit sterile with a somewhat "made on a grid" vibe, but then again that may have been your intent. I think if you looked at this piece as a jumping off point into something much grander you could really take it to another level, building off of the main bassline and piano melody you've laid down adding textures and counterpoint.


5 pts - Olly Audio - Some nice textures and interesting instrumentation which definitely makes the piece feel very "meditative", although I'd kind of lost interest by the 4:00 mark as the track dishes up more of the same.

[donkey tugger]

9 pts -Moa -......
Personally I would have cut the 1st chorus in half and leave the listener wanting more of that great hook later down the track.

Great minds think alike..well, you and me anyhow!

[Nige]

9 pts -Moa -......
Personally I would have cut the 1st chorus in half and leave the listener wanting more of that great hook later down the track.

Great minds think alike..well, you and me anyhow!

Orr shit you did say that, now I look like a plagiarist hehehe