Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC094 June 2025 - Voting until 01-JUN-2025 23:59 UTC+2/CEST
Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2025 04:34 CEST
by toadhjo
Solid group of entries, folks! It seems we're going for quality over quantity this month 
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Votes
Self-Reflection
Also, thank you everyone for your feedback. I'll respond to feedback in another post after everyone votes.
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► Show Spoiler
JeroenZuiderwijk
This is a well-composed, really soothing piece. Good sound choices -- the strings sounded a bit cheesy to me at first but after listening for a while my ear accepted them.
@1:07 nice harmonies
@1:28 Cool breakdown and good job building it back up. I appreciate the change in the bass pattern, too. The melodies and harmonies @1:42 are a delight.
Often I feel like your pieces jump from idea to idea too quickly. I still feel that a little bit this time -- for example, the break from 0:38 to 0:44 could be a bit longer -- but overall I think this piece has a nice flow. Well done!
P.S. The riffs from your last month's entry still pop into my head from time to time. It's quite catchy!
Rick Finsta
Cool punk song! It's nice to hear you submit a full song with lyrics. Your voice is punchy and good for this kind of music. As for the lyrics, I don't think they come off as overly preachy or anything like that, but I to be honest I didn't analyze them that deeply. If you posted them I would take another look.
I do hear some issues with the arrangement and mix. I think there's a bit too much going on, especially in the high mids. The wide-panned guitar harmonics are distracting, particularly when I listen on headphones. And during the first line of lyrics, I feel like your voice and guitar are competing for attention instead of complementing each other.
I also feel the bass guitar could be a bit louder, especially the harmonics. You got lots of space in the 200-1000hz range that the bass guitar would just love to fill.
(Aside: When I'm mixing I use a free plugin from TBProAudio that lets me easily isolate frequency ranges and listen to them. I think it's handy for finding areas that are either too empty or too busy. It lives on my master buss, ready to go when needed. Link: https://www.tbproaudio.de/products/isol8)
The breakdown and solo @1:00 are well done. Same goes for @2:16. Very smooth changeup. I get the sense that you weren't sure how to end the song, though -- maybe sing the chorus one more time with double-time drums?
Good entry all-around. I do wonder how it would come across if you stripped down the arrangement -- maybe even just voice and acoustic guitar.
MellowBrowne
Smoother than smooth. Your track exudes a sense of mastery, the feeling that you know exactly what you're doing. I definitely get the Empire State vibes. I'm not particularly well-versed in hip hop but even I can feel that NYC energy. You nailed it.
If I'm not mistaken there are four major parts, with transitions at 1:26, 2:35, and 3:56. I think the first is the best, almost like a new section of the same beat, while the last one feels a bit forced to my ear -- more like a transition to a new track than a continuation of the previous one.
There's not a lot to critique, honestly. All the elements fit nicely together. The horns and strings sound extremely natural. The basslines are suitably funky. The kick and percussion are dominant but not overpowering. I really like the vocal sample in the last section.
I really enjoy the track but I'm a bit torn over the voting aspect. Though I do think it's the best production this month, as a "song" it feels incomplete -- as you alluded to, these beats are waiting for someone to drop lines on top of them. I had to keep that in mind when assigning my votes -- forgive me!
This is a well-composed, really soothing piece. Good sound choices -- the strings sounded a bit cheesy to me at first but after listening for a while my ear accepted them.
@1:07 nice harmonies
@1:28 Cool breakdown and good job building it back up. I appreciate the change in the bass pattern, too. The melodies and harmonies @1:42 are a delight.
Often I feel like your pieces jump from idea to idea too quickly. I still feel that a little bit this time -- for example, the break from 0:38 to 0:44 could be a bit longer -- but overall I think this piece has a nice flow. Well done!
P.S. The riffs from your last month's entry still pop into my head from time to time. It's quite catchy!
Rick Finsta
Cool punk song! It's nice to hear you submit a full song with lyrics. Your voice is punchy and good for this kind of music. As for the lyrics, I don't think they come off as overly preachy or anything like that, but I to be honest I didn't analyze them that deeply. If you posted them I would take another look.
I do hear some issues with the arrangement and mix. I think there's a bit too much going on, especially in the high mids. The wide-panned guitar harmonics are distracting, particularly when I listen on headphones. And during the first line of lyrics, I feel like your voice and guitar are competing for attention instead of complementing each other.
I also feel the bass guitar could be a bit louder, especially the harmonics. You got lots of space in the 200-1000hz range that the bass guitar would just love to fill.
(Aside: When I'm mixing I use a free plugin from TBProAudio that lets me easily isolate frequency ranges and listen to them. I think it's handy for finding areas that are either too empty or too busy. It lives on my master buss, ready to go when needed. Link: https://www.tbproaudio.de/products/isol8)
The breakdown and solo @1:00 are well done. Same goes for @2:16. Very smooth changeup. I get the sense that you weren't sure how to end the song, though -- maybe sing the chorus one more time with double-time drums?
Good entry all-around. I do wonder how it would come across if you stripped down the arrangement -- maybe even just voice and acoustic guitar.
MellowBrowne
Smoother than smooth. Your track exudes a sense of mastery, the feeling that you know exactly what you're doing. I definitely get the Empire State vibes. I'm not particularly well-versed in hip hop but even I can feel that NYC energy. You nailed it.
If I'm not mistaken there are four major parts, with transitions at 1:26, 2:35, and 3:56. I think the first is the best, almost like a new section of the same beat, while the last one feels a bit forced to my ear -- more like a transition to a new track than a continuation of the previous one.
There's not a lot to critique, honestly. All the elements fit nicely together. The horns and strings sound extremely natural. The basslines are suitably funky. The kick and percussion are dominant but not overpowering. I really like the vocal sample in the last section.
I really enjoy the track but I'm a bit torn over the voting aspect. Though I do think it's the best production this month, as a "song" it feels incomplete -- as you alluded to, these beats are waiting for someone to drop lines on top of them. I had to keep that in mind when assigning my votes -- forgive me!
► Show Spoiler
1 JeroenZuiderwijk
2 Rick Finsta
3 MellowBrowne
2 Rick Finsta
3 MellowBrowne
► Show Spoiler
I'm feeling a bit of uncertainty at the moment. I know the music I'm making isn't as good as I want it to be, but it's hard for me to pinpoint exactly where the issue is. There are a few very clear issues to deal with (vocal performance, first and foremost! lol), but I'm not sure what aspect to focus on beyond that. The songwriting? The mix? The instrumental performances? Of course they all could be better, but which one is the biggest bottleneck?
I'm thinking maybe I should record covers of some of my favorite songs. At least that would eliminate the songwriting variable from the quality equation, letting me focus solely on the performance and mixing aspects.
I'm thinking maybe I should record covers of some of my favorite songs. At least that would eliminate the songwriting variable from the quality equation, letting me focus solely on the performance and mixing aspects.
A friendly reminder: