A Future in Noise wrote: ↑Wed Aug 31, 2022 21:52 CEST
Intro is two bars too long. Cut the last two bars.
Very true, that's already fixed.
A Future in Noise wrote: ↑Wed Aug 31, 2022 21:52 CEST
From 0:43 – 0:48 I really don't understand the harmonic progression here (”day by day”); the tones from the double bass seems not to fit together with the guitar, the pizzicato violin (if that's what it is) and vocals? It would take too much time for me to figure out exactly which tones the instruments are playing; especially for the guitar it's all little bit hard to tell what it is doing. All this is repeated one more time.
A bit lengthy answer, but I enjoy thinking and pondering these kind of things.
I don't hear any problems with chord progression and the bass line. Maybe the problem you're hearing is caused by my hasty pitchy singing. I was running out of minutes, so I didn't have time to do better versions nor pitch corrections. (And in that last minute chaos I managed also to mark the wrong competition number to my submission.) There were also couple of wrong violin notes here and there, but probably not in those parts. I don't remember anymore.
But anyway, now that voting is ended I decided to activate my old SoundCloud account and uploaded a more finished version of the song.
https://soundcloud.com/olli-h-pajulintu ... -at-a-time
Hopefully, that version feels sonically a bit more correct. (In that new version there's also an added synth with my first self made Voltage synth preset. Voltage is quite an interesting machine, if one is interested to study what's happening within synth.)
But the main idea of that part is chromatic bass-line with chord inversions. A trick used quite often in classical music, jazz. And also The Beatles uses that kind of tricks in many of their songs. That part of the song is in the key of Am.
Chord progression from Dm to Am:
A#dim > B7 > E7 > Am
Guitar is playing just those chord, So is violin.
Chromatic bassline from D to A:
A# > A > G# > A
Analysis:
A#dim / A#: dissonant start, bass plays the root of the chord
B7 / A: subdominant of the E7, bass plays the 7th of the chord
E7 / #G: dominant of the root, bass plays the 3rd of the chord
Am / A: Root
As B7 > E7 > Am is a very basic sub-dominant>dominant>root -progression, I guess it's the starting A#dim that bothers you. Dim-chord is always very dissonant, but on the other hand or maybe for that reason it can be added after any chord. But does it sound as a mistake? I guess it's to be determined by what happens after it.
A Future in Noise wrote: ↑Wed Aug 31, 2022 21:52 CEST
Pizzicato violin could be water drops. I like the maracas, but in terms of awaking water associations, the maracas don't have that influence on me.
In this case it's not intended to resemble the water. Although I normally try to follow rules over-rigorously, in my mind the drops and the lyrics have enough of watery feeling for one song. Now that I think of it, the shaker with that added SoundToys effect is probably the sound of hungry disease eating me "day by day, one piece at a time".
Nice work.
