Commenting process is mentally easy for me, but the voting process is always pure pain.
To make it easier for me, I have always wanted to keep my evaluation process clear and open. As this months genre is rock/pop I decided to use following checkpoints
Melody: 0-10/10
Arrangement: 0-5/5
Sound: 0-5/5
Engagement: 0-5/5
So I gave to melody line more importance. With Engagement I mean something abstract, subjective experience like how the music connection to the listener, in this case to me. If given total points were the same, I checked the melody points.
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Mobiledrummer: Another Whirligig
Lots of nice ideas in this. Groove Rolls skilfully all the time. You surely have great arrangement skills. Especially you seem to know how to create small and important details to drum groove. Furthermore, the bass line interacts with drums very nicely. Together they create a very strong backbone to your submission.
But as this is a songwriting competition, as such I think your submission is missing clear focus point for ear to follow. This way it feels more like a great backing track where the lead instrument/vocal is muted.
It would be difficult to sing along this as the melody line is having big interval jumps all the time. For the same reason it’s a bit difficult to remember. So, now these melody lines sound more like supportive counter-melody lines, not the main melody lines. But the way it is now, it would work nicely as a support for the (missing) primary vocal/melody line.
Soundwise everything is probably too stereo now. If some synths (not all) were a bit more mono, it would be easier for ear to follow what’s happening. And the sound stage would be even more 3-dimensional. But if you were to add a simple and catchy main melody line, I'm sure this track would be sonicwise a perfect the way it is now.
From the mood of this song, the old "Love Boat Theme" came to my mind. Although it doesn't use any synths, it still might be a good reference song to use while mixing. Listen how those mono sounding instruments "Love Boat" together create a nice 3-dimensional sound stage.
Melody: 5/10
Arrangement: 4/5
Sound: 4/5
Engagement: 4/5
TOTAL 16
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J.Ruegg: Runner
Very nice opening. The vocals are very expressive and soulful.
The great beginning creates a big expectation for this song. Everything works very nicely to the point when the chorus comes in. But then something happens. As if the chorus is taken from another song. Or maybe the chorus is too similar to verses, but still not the same. Whatever is the cause, to me, it feels that chorus never comes. The rest of the song feels to be some sort of eternal and constantly changing prechorus loop.
Still, despite the criticism, I think you’ve got something special here. Although the points given by me don't show it, I think this is the song which has the biggest potential in it. If you work a little bit more with this, you’ll get absolutely great and unique song.
If I were to make an arrangement for this song, I might take some guidance from Fleetwood Mac’s ”Go Your Own Way”: first, the opening the way you have it now, then drums in with some weird groove, and then into chorus with more simple straight drums and shakers. (I don't mean that the groove as such should be borrowed, but the bigger idea of rhythmical movement from plain and simple to weird and finally to strong and straight.)
Minor point: synth chords, that hit with the beat one, feel like they are rhythmically dragging behind. Maybe the attack curve of the synth sound is too slow and energy point comes a bit too late, i.e. it's not meant to be used as rhythmic element but more like a smooth pad.
If we had here "arrangement competitions", this one could provide a perfect material to it: a song with absolutely great potential that hasn't come to bloom yet. (@Mister Fox: Actually, "arrangement competitions" might be an interesting middle step to lure people from mixing competitions to songwriting competitions. Now the gap between "mixing" and "songwriting" is probably too big and scary for many mixing hobbyist to take.)
Melody: 6/10
Arrangement: 2/5
Sound: 3/5
Engagement: 4/5
TOTAL 15
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EsteveCorbera: ViscaEls80
You have great arrangement skills, groove flows nicely all through the song. Technically you surely have talent to do whatever.
As with some other submissions I feel your melody lines feel more like supportive lines, not the main melody lines. So in that sense it feels to me that this song is missing the main message carrier. For that reason it's a bit difficult for my mind to connect to this song. As such it could be perfect for some documentary film, where the music's role is more to emphasise message, and not to steal attention from the main story (visual or spoken).
The kick is very dominantly giving 1-2-3-4 beat (one bar loop). I personally start to wait and wish some sort of variations. But later, when the change comes (1-2-and-3-4), for some reason, it doesn't have a right effect to me. It feels a little like street bumps. Maybe the velocity with "and" should be smoother. Or, at the point when the change comes, I might try longer loop, for example 2-bar loop:
... and | 1-2-3-4 | 1-2-and-3-4-and | 1-2-3-4 | 1-2-and-3-4-and |... Well, I may be totally wrong, that was just an untested quick idea from a hobbyist who is not familiar with this genre.
Melody: 5/10
Arrangement: 4/5
Sound: 4/5
Engagement: 3/5
TOTAL 16
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becsei_gyorgy: I'm Different
Very well done!
Arrangement is just perfect. Nothing to add.
Sound is already great the way it is. So not much to add there. Well, maybe the overuse of sound effects maybe diminishes sonic experience a bit.
If I were to mix this, I might try to use Phill Collins’ version of the classic ”Love Don’t Come Easy” as a reference. It might give some small hints to add some small anti-midi sound levels to the final sound.
So, to me, your musical skills seem to be superb. No doubt about that! This would have been a clear winner candidate for me, BUT as the great and catchy melody lines are probably taken from some sample library, it’s a bit difficult to evaluate this from the point of view of songwriting competition. To me, this is more like a great production submission, not a songwriting submission. But still, you have added very nice lines in other parts that show you could have done great melody lines by your self. (If I have understood the situation wrongly, and also those vocal melody lines are made by you, I’m ready and glad to give full 10/10 for the melody.)
Melody: 3/10
Arrangement: 5/5
Sound: 4/5
Engagement: 3/5
TOTAL 15
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A Future In Noise: Caesar Is Coming
First of all, this is great song with strong and bold mood. That's the main thing I want to say.
Then some minor details/ideas to make it even better:
To me your chorus is melodically great, but verses feel a bit weaker. The rhythm of lyrics in choruses flow nicely, but in verses last lines feel rhythmically a bit clumsy. Well maybe also the last word "this" in choruses comes a bit detached. I like the idea of it being alone, but maybe some small instrumentation tricks might glue it more to the main sentence.
Another point of view, it may be so that current arrangement in micro level doesn’t yet support melody lines in verses optimally yet. For some reason the sparse instrumentation without drums in verses doesn’t roll fluently. But in choruses the arrangement and melody line go together perfectly. But still I feel that the big view in your arrangement works nicely. So I'm not proposing to add more drums to verses.
To fix small arrangement and sound details I might use as a reference Jayhawks’ song ”Angelyne”. For example, listen how they start with double guitars, then add drums, and every now and then go back to drumless accompaingement.
To me, the reverb in guitars is not optimal yet. Now they create a bit unnatural distant space. I might try less reverb with emphasis more on early reflection and then pan the guitars more to left and right. That might give more depth to the overall sound.
The use of pads gives a bit uncertain feeling. As if you are just testing different pad sounds, and then time run out and you just decided to publish it.
But overall, and main thing is, I feel you have made a strong song that connects me to something. I end up listening, and I forget to analyze. That’s what should happen with music. You managed to give both "a ride" and "ammunition" to the listener.
Afterwards, having listened this song quite many times, for certain reasons it came to my mind that this song might work perfectly with totally different arrangement. For example how about similar simple treatment that one anti-establishment Vladimir — that is to say Vladimir Vysotsky — gives to his strong songs. Listen, for example, ”He Did Not Return From Battle”. Focus is 100% in vocals and lyrics. Although I don't understand a word of that language, I feel that guy said something important. And afterwards one doesn’t even remember that there was a band at all, although it had a quite a big role.
Melody: 7/10
Arrangement: 3/5
Sound: 2/5
Engagement: 5/5
TOTAL 17
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Arelem: Under My Skin
This one is great and skillfully done! The vision is coherent throughout.
Clear catchy intro. After 2 seconds I can hear that this one works and connects. Clear motivated changes from verse to prechorus to chorus. Focus point for listening is clear all through the song. It's easy to roll along with this song.
I like your voice. It has some kind of "street cred" in it. You have a skill to tell a story. Maybe you could boldly enhance that aspect of your voice in your mix. Now you have given a bit shy treatment to your voice.
Maybe chorus arrangement could give more rolling feeling in contrast to staccato riffs prominent in other parts. Now chorus feels more like a great prechorus. I end up waiting chorus to come. Or maybe another added guitar or whatever with straight 8:th part beat might fix this issue. Or smoothly rolling guitar solo might fix the problem and satisfy my longing for the rolling chorus.
Melody: 8/10
Arrangement: 4/5
Sound: 4/5
Engagement: 5/5
TOTAL 21
► Show Spoiler
01 (10 pts) - Arelem
02 (9 pts) - A Future In Noise
05 (8 pts) - Mobiledrummer
03 (7 pts) - EsteveCorbera
04 (6 pts) - J.Ruegg
06 (5 pts) - becsei_gyorgy