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SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Winners announced

Thematic Songwriting Competition - recurrence: monthly
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Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#51

Post by Rich_Rath »

PocketSunlight wrote:
Wed Sep 14, 2022 14:33 CEST
Title Never Enough
Hi Mr Pocket Sunshine, I checked out yr SoundCloud on Olli's recommendation. Wow. Eclectic and really well done. Follow. Will check your YouTube later.

This is a great song. The production is pro, you have a great voice, and there are little Easter eggs like the manipulated backup vocals during the lead. (I did hear that, right?) The guitar hook is memorable, and the lyrics get the point across clearly.

If it were mine, I would think about it dubwise to bring some variety and add some development. By that, I mean through taking parts in and out selectively. As it is, It starts on 10 and stays there until the end. Maybe experiment with pulling instruments, including the lead, out of the mix doing different things at different points and keeping the whole mix for a grand finale. I am not sure what and where to try cutting since this is so tight, but it might be fun to try.
Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#52

Post by Rich_Rath »

A Future in Noise wrote:
Thu Sep 15, 2022 15:07 CEST
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Mental Health
The acoustic guitars are wonderfully recorded. Are they samples or are you playing? I am guessing you are playing because there is a nice instrumental break. The strings were unexpected and add an element of drama. The lyrics are really evocative. I am not sure there is anything I would change on it. I can't think of anything.
Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#53

Post by Rich_Rath »

Olli H wrote:
Thu Sep 15, 2022 21:54 CEST
https://soundcloud.com/olli-h-pajulintu ... al_sharing

EDIT: Updated version. Double bass changed to electric bass. Some changes in the mix.

Lyrics are in Finnish, and they are written by my wife.

Descriptions coming soon
I could tell before even listening (by reading your comments) that you are a discerning musician and that is certainly reflected in your contribution. The raked muted guitar makes for a really catchy opening. Your guitar playing and the tone are marvelous. Sounds like the cool band in the cool sixties club in a French New Wave film. While the guitar carries the vibe beautifully, the other instruments are pretty flawless in backing up that sound. Instrumentally, the only critique I have is that the rake wore out it's welcome by playing it every verse. Maybe drop it here and there, or do a one muted rake note feint or something something different to keep the rake special, like it starts out.
The lyrics, which I am sure lose a bit in translation, are really evocative and sad in a touching way. It seems that even though your wife wrote it, she does so from the perspective of a man in a relationship, right? That is kind of cool.

Anyway, great song!
Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#54

Post by Rich_Rath »

Olli H wrote:
Wed Sep 14, 2022 18:18 CEST
Rich_Rath wrote:
Wed Sep 14, 2022 06:12 CEST
Hi, here is my first entry in a contest, this one struck home for me.
But to make your song to shine, there's one thing you should fix before doing the final singing. Your current version is a bit difficult to listen due to rhythmical problems. I'm quite sure that the drums and bass are just what they should be. But guitars have some bad timing problems. As if you had recorded them without properly hearing drums and bass. And that probably also affects your singing. It feels that you're not sure what to listen for the timing of the words.

That fuzz guitar solo is nice. How about making a bit darker, more energy to lower mids. And then give more room to it by playing simplified rhythm guitars during the solo, for example just quarter notes with downstrokes. And after the solo back to 8th note strumming.
The timing problems are all fixed I hope. I retracked pretty much everything but the drum and bass. You are right about them sounding like I couldn't hear the drums because I recorded the guitars first because that is the instrument I play. I just needed a placeholder arrangement until I got the drums and bass in place. I posted it early to make sure I entered. Now it sounds good I think but I'm open to further suggestions.

The suggestion to EQ the fuzz was one I took, and it makes the lead sound weightier instead of like an electric kazoo. I tried scalng back the busyness of the rhythm guitars for the fuzzfest, but it made the the lead incoherent. That much fuzz really needs a wall of sound behind it I think. I tried to tic-tac the guitars during the lead too, but that was much worse.

Thanks for excellent feedback which I hope brought the song up to snuff.
Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#55

Post by Rich_Rath »

GamaGama wrote:
Sat Sep 17, 2022 18:07 CEST
Thank you very much for the topic, and in particular for the attention that has been placed on the moment of extreme difficulty that we are all going through, with particular attention to the less strong people.
The song did make smile, one of its goals, so it is a success on that score. The drums sound great, not too sequenced/robotic. I think I'm still hearing quantization on the bass which makes things a little stiff until the organ kicks in. After that it develops a nice groove that sounds great. I'm wondering if you might do some of that same humanization you did for the drums to the bass. One thing I would try besides that is to make the bass a little more "Jamaican" by trying a square-wave based bass patch + some tube saturation with the high frequencies rolled off a little, which would give it a nice dubby sound and pull the bass back in the mix a little. It is like a lead instrument now.

I have no idea if any of this would work, and it is great as is too. Fantastic sequencing skills and a great culture mashup.
Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#56

Post by Rich_Rath »

KukoBass wrote:
Mon Sep 19, 2022 15:15 CEST
Hello everybody,

this is my entry for this month. A very slow and very minimal song, only 4 Instruments and my distorted voice, talking about my depression. Very bare and repetitive by purpose, because that how life feels to me.
This really evokes depression well. Said as a fellow sufferer. The repetive low end is particularly interesting to me and I love the drums of doom in the last minute. In it's minimalism, it reminds me of one of my favorite bands, the duo Broadcast. One thing I would explore might be to add some imperfection to the bass. There seems to be a little detuning and maybe some randomization but it could be effectively made more textural. Psychic modulation's phonec comes to mind, but maybe have a hunt through the puremagnetick vst offerings, both for effects and synths. They are super affordable. Another possibility would be WA productions Imperfect Synth, which is on sale at plugin boutique for pretty cheap this week. I really like that synth! Anyway some wobbly melty digitally distorted texture would provide more atmosphere while keeping true to the repetitiveness. Free advice, so take it for what it's worth! Thanks for sharing this super personal and evocative song.
Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#57

Post by Rich_Rath »

Dear David John wrote:
Tue Sep 20, 2022 07:56 CEST
After knowing about this Competition forum and chatting to other participants for months, I have now decided to dive in, thanks to a very pertinent theme. A lot has already been said by some great creators in this forum so I will not go into to much detail.
A truly poignant and beautiful song. From the vinatge sounding piano to the choir-like vocals melding with the orchestral parts. The repeated stanza is really nice...I'm floundering a bit for words. And I really like the subtle vinyl effect. Really well put together, and I have nothing but praise for it
Rich_Rath
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2022 05:50 CEST

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#58

Post by Rich_Rath »

EsteveCorbera wrote:
Tue Sep 20, 2022 22:32 CEST
Challenge companions and Mister Fox, Good night!!

Introducing my theme for this month's challenge.
As always, the challenge allows me to look for new things and keep experimenting.
I wanted to make a fairly calm theme, which does not have a conventional structure. Combine background textures with voices. I'm not used to working with voices (samples) but this time I wanted to use them and apply note changes and an effect to change the sound of the vowels.
I spent a lot of time on it, first composing it and then mixing and mastering it.

I hope you find it interesting.
Another one I would not change a note of. The care and time you put into this piece are evident in the results. In particular, I wouldn't have known the vocals were sampled had you not said it inyr post. Nothing to add but that I clearly enjoyed listening.
EsteveCorbera
Posts: 197
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Location: Catalunya

Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#59

Post by EsteveCorbera »

Rich_Rath wrote:
Thu Sep 22, 2022 09:34 CEST
Another one I would not change a note of. The care and time you put into this piece are evident in the results. In particular, I wouldn't have known the vocals were sampled had you not said it inyr post. Nothing to add but that I clearly enjoyed listening.
Thanks for your comments.
I certainly spent a lot of time working on my presentation this month this time.
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A Future in Noise
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Location: Stockholm, Sweden
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Re: SONGWRITING COMPETITION - SWC061 September 2022 - Submissions until 24-09-2022 23:59 UTC+2/CEST

#60

Post by A Future in Noise »

Rich_Rath wrote:
Thu Sep 22, 2022 06:46 CEST
Are they samples or are you playing? I am guessing you are playing ...
Yes, the acoustic guitar is a real one. But I had to use many, many takes and then cut, move and glue ... It's definately not one take!

As for All Empty, there is one tiny little detail I would like to change: those three tones before the verse, for example during 0:57 – 0:58 (”well in my ...”): the guitar player uses the same three (single) notes as the singer. Plain eighth notes. After such a “naive” “prelude” (I apologize that English isn't my native language) I'd expect something completely different. (A nursery rhyme instead of distorted guitars, maybe?)

You have some unexpected chords with a bass line to them that fits in very well. Very attractive. The timing is still not perfect, but maybe, in the cow punk genre, this is just how it's supposed to be?
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